put the cards on the table.

just got off the phone with him. we'd been on the phone for almost two hours.

i laid out all the cards on the table. I told him that there's too much good stuff to throw away, but the bad stuff, albeit small in quantity, is BIG. and then i told him, tearfully, i don't know if i want to do this anymore.

he cried. he put his cards on the table, too. he agrees with the good stuff/bad stuff. but started to cry when i said i didn't know about us anymore.

"i'm going to leave for a couple of days," i told him. "to think." he asked me to be there when he got home, and then to see if i still need to go. i agreed that was fair enough, and that i'm being pretty cowardly to take off when he's gone.

we'll just have to see where the day takes us.