forgive me father, for I have sinned.

I just told a WHOPPER of a lie.

I'm a bad person.

I mean a really bad person.

10 Things You Don't Know About Women by Alyssa Milano

1. Women are innately self-conscious. This is not a choice; it's a genderwide condition. On a bad day, I look in the mirror and see my ten-pound-heavier alter ego. Her name is Bertha. On a really bad day, Bertha sees her two-hundred-pound-heavier alter ego. Her name is Brian Dennehy.

2. Women produce half the world's food but own only 1 percent of its farmland. So we're fine with you picking up the tab. And after about three thousand dinners at Nobu, we should be even.

3. Women like porn, too. We just hate it when you hide the porn.

4. Women remember everything. Don't believe me? Ask your girlfriend where you met. She won't tell you it was at a party. She'll say it was a Thursday, she had just come from dinner, where she ate a veggie burger, and she was wearing her friend Cathy's pink top, which was big on her because Cathy is a big girl. You were wearing a blue button-down, drinking a Jack and Coke with two straws, and talking to Bill, that mutual friend. She waved and you gave her the "what's up" nod. This still infuriates her. ("How could you give me the nod?")

5. An eyelash curler, while mean and ferocious looking, is not a weapon.

6. No matter how much your woman loves you, there are going to be three to seven days each month when she wants you dead. (She may even quietly fantasize about turning her eyelash curler against you.) You have two options: Tie yourself to a tree and wait out the storm, or stock up at Tiffany's, toss a blue box or two into the wind, and hope for the best. We recommend the latter. (The key chain doesn't count.)

7. We think it's weird when you watch sports and concentrate to help your team.

8. "Hey, Melissa, who's the boss?" Not a good pickup line. "Hey, Phoebe, where'd you park your broomstick?" Not a good pickup line. "Hey, Alyssa, you look 250 pounds lighter than Brian Dennehy in that dress." Surprisingly good pickup line.

9. Women hear better than men. That's before you even factor in listening skills and attention spans. Come to think of it, I should have listed this one first because I'm sure I've lost you by now.

10. You may be surprised to know that women were responsible for inventing all of the following: the circular saw, the signal flare, the space suit, the bulletproof vest, and the windshield wiper. You're welcome.


*taken from Esquire magazine

**fun fact: Back in 1993, I had to touch Alyssa Milano's boobs in a makeshift dressing room to help her get a tight shirt on. Jealous? *LOL*

thought for the day.

had a startling revelation at 4 a.m. this of course, following a HUGE row that chris & i got into this morning.

a wise person once said, "people tell you exactly who they are. the trick is to actually listen."

we're back in a good place now. it took some talking, crying, hugging - but it was worth it.

4th week - have to vent.

hello hello...

4th week into my leave... and I'm a bit relaxed. Gone is the tingling in my arms. Have a second interview with a great prospect on Friday. Supposed to get a call from another company about setting up an interview.

So, I've settled into a routine where I'm actually relaxed. Yes, I'm a bit bored, but I can't help it - I'm Type A. Here's my peeve though... because I am on this leave, my sister seems to think I don't do anything all day long. So, she's taken the liberty to volunteer me for various family projects. I'm like - WTF? Driving my little brother to LAX, watching my parents' house for the air conditioning guy, take their dog to the vet, etc. etc. Not that I mind - but ASK first, you know? My parents were, "We weren't going to ask you because you're always doing something, but she said you could."

And then she gets upset with me when I ask her to ASK me first. She goes, "What else do you have going on that you can't do that?" I wanted smack the crap out of her.

But I choose not to stress over that. I'm about picking the battles.