today, my baby sister got engaged. YEY!!! after 15 years of going out with him, 2 breakups, and moving into their own home just this past year, he finally proposed.
i'm so happy for her. it's about time. i mean really, we were all beginning to wonder why he hadn't popped the question. i couldn't believe it. she was going to get married.
and then it hit me - she found her one. she found the someone that she wants to be with for the rest of her life, and he loves her so much - that he asked her to be a part of his. it was a surreal mix of happiness, and sadness all at the same time. so happy that they found each other, and pure saddness that I wonder if he's out there for me too.
as i lay in bed with my best guy friend, i break down into tears about how i feel. he thinks what we have is pretty great. that we have plans for the future. that we plan on being in each others' lives for as long as we live. that we love each other - just as much as we did when we first met.
but we're in different circumstances, remember? he just finalized his divorce from a bad marriage. i want to have someone to love and adore me forever, but scared to death about getting that feeling of being stuck in someone else's cage.
is it possible that cyncism is slowly eating away at my hope?
that i'm beginning to not believe the whole "happily ever after."
1 comment:
I think Jessica getting engaged is your reason to believe in the Happily Ever After. It does happen.
you are the most cynical Taurus I've ever known.
I love you, unconditionally, forever.
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